I just got back from a 6d/5n stay in London. I'm a bit tired now, especially with my cold that went full force since yesterday, but my mind's too busy processing things right now.
You know how sometimes you keep thinking that it's impossible to do something and all you wanna do is give up instead of going kamikaze? Well that happened to me, specifically last Friday. I was dreading it all week, fearing I'd be swallowed alive by a wave of fire.
But you know what happened? The unthinkable.
I got what I wanted.
And now, instead of rejoicing with glee, I'm sitting here feeling anxious about what's in store for me.
Everything that I know and everyone that I've met will soon become a distant memory. In order to achieve my goal, I'll be sacrificing those that I've come to accept as my own family.
You know how you've grown so close to someone who's been so kind to you that you can't help but feel affectionate about that person.
I'm embarking on a new life and frankly, it's horribly scary.
It's funny how my biggest dream is also my biggest fear.
I know that you need to sacrifice a few things in order to succeed and God knows how much I want to succeed, but at times I do wonder if it will all be worth it. It's going to be one painfully lonely trip but I know I've gotta get through this. It's my destiny and I will make it happen.
"Ya Allah, syukur alhamdulillah for granting me this wish. I'm only a humble servant and I don't deserve such kindness from You, but I will make the most of what You have granted to me and I won't let You down."
P/S: Sorry for the cryptic post, but I'm not at liberty to divulge in details until it gets confirmed. If you really wanna know, then ask me.
